In regards to Monique's question, I would like for her to read my experience and reflect:

When my son was a baby, I struggled to go to Mass for the first time and it was hard to keep him quiet. I was trying not to get discouraged and determined to stay throughout the Mass. However, the usher went up to me and asked me to leave the church because my son was too noisy. I left embarrassed since he did that with everyone staring. It took me years to return to church -- many years without Christ in my life -- and then I found out there was a cry room which is soundproof and parents can take their kids when they are noisy and still listen to Mass. The usher never told me about that room. He just told me to leave church. One thing is for sure: We should love one another and never interfere with a person's desire to be at church. God has in his Scripture: "Come to me" and does not state "Except if you have noisy children."

I plead for Monique and her son to be more sympathetic and understanding.

L.T.--

If I understand you correctly, you chose not to take out of Mass a child you evidently realized was crying loudly, and then became upset with an usher who asked you to do so. If you did not act to address your child's obvious needs within a reasonable time frame, then the usher acted within his authority to ask you to do so. Just as an usher in a movie theater has the authority given him by management to politely ask patrons to comply with the rules of the establishment, so an usher in a church may do the same if he has been duly deputized to so by the pastor. If the usher acted tactlessly or did not give you necessary information, you could have made an appointment to discuss the matter with the pastor.

It should be noted that perhaps you did not know that the care of a minor child is just reason to either miss Mass altogether or to step out of Mass to care for the child. Perhaps you feared that you might in some way sin if you did not stay in the church the whole time, even though your son obviously needed attention and care. If so, then rest assured that was not the case.

Michelle Arnold
Catholic Answers

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